Toon Guys

Toon Guys is interesting. It's not turning me on. They offer poorly drawn, poorly photo-shopped cartoons in interesting scenarios with zero build up having bizarre sloppy sex. The appeal in this type of pornography is the artists ability to create anything he wants. I’d say it costs too much, but the fact is 5 bucks a month would be more than I’d be happy paying. So the 29.99 isn’t sounding too good right now. If there were a new layout, new different design, and extended scenarios with dialogue – this reviewer would be singing a different tune.

Certainly, their choice of scenarios for a photoset were not bad ideas. For example, in one you may be following a man walking his dog in the park, when he sees his neighbor…and then they fuck. Basically, that’s it. There is no dialogue. They are usually already naked by the second or third picture. What about build up? When I am imagining a real-life scenario, like fucking my neighbor in the park, I want to believe it. And I am not going to believe it if there is Zero Build Up. You don’t just run into a neighbor and instantly have his cock down your throat. I am going to get turned on by watching these guys “Naturally” come into that scenario. So, that appeal is wasted, lost, and non-existent at Toon Guys .

The saving grace of Drawn Porn is that the artist can create anyone he desires. Meaning, you can draw the hottest guy in the world, with the biggest dick, rock hard biceps, and a chiseled jaw … with this amazing freedom to create tantalizing sexual scenarios you’d think you’d whip out some raunchy hot men. Its not my cup of tea. If I were a 14 year old Girl searching for silly Manga with gay sex, then Toon Guys would be right up my alley. The Font, The Pictures, The Comics themselves all reverberate a cold damp “Please Do Not Jerk Off” vibe. I feel like you’re over extending yourself to try and see these images as sexually invigorating. And needless to say, that’s more trouble than its worth. The depiction of the Asshole is interesting…to say the least. It is usually portrayed as a hole 4 inches across gaping into the black pit of his intestines. I thought we liked a nice tight Dirt Star, not this Black Abyss.



If I'm lost in the loop of Gay Desire – Let me know. I understand we’ve all got our own unique tastes and kinky fetishes. I want to be happy with some Drawn Porn, and I’m disappointed that Toon Guys did not come through for me. But Honestly when I first read the name I knew it wasn’t going to go well for me. Toon just is not what I imagine as hot. And when it cums down to it people, what do we really want from our porn? We want to be turned on, we want to feel like we are getting our dollars worth, and we don’t want to feel trapped in this unsatisfactory mediocrity. Draw your own dick and you’re going to blow your load three times before your cock even recognizes what its seeing at Toon Guys is Porn. And there Ladies and Ladies is why it’s a good thing we’re all thinking with our cocks and not our brains.