DILF Lovers

DILF Lovers isn’t what it’s cracked up to be. When I think about hot dads stripping I get all weak in the knees. I’ve had crushes on older men for as long as I can remember. When I was seven I remember eating nutter butters with my next door neighbor’s dad, watching reruns of the Brady Bunch, wishing to my already agnostic God that he’d take his shirt off. Feeling those first rumbling in my pants is something I don’t think I’ll ever be able to explain. It’s a right brain experience, not meant to be put into words. I didn’t understand the concept of sex at the time. And judging from the men in DILF Lovers they don’t understand the concept of sex either.

The skits are bland, the men are average at best and they all start and end on the same note. An older man opening the door, a younger guy entering, butt sex and blowjobs---yawn. I’m tired. Please wake me when a gay thug site gets loaded, or when Twinks in the Army or whatever the hell it’s called is on my laptop. I think DILF Lovers would be hotter if the fathers really were the masculine dad from the block. In my head I have Uncle Jesse from Full House in a scene, Pierce Brosnan and maybe a vintage David Hasselhoff. Oh, and I’d throw in Brad Pitt, too. But that would be for ultimate members.

You’d have to add an extra Hamilton a month for that (Angelina Jolie NOT INVITED. She needs to watch over the litter anyhow). Of all the theme-cheese-porn out there, THIS is the one to invest time in the script; some dialogue would help make this more exciting. Let’s have junior ask Mr. Landry to help him put together a computer, or fix a bike or something. Do something fatherly. Come back from the office in a pin stripe suit and briefcase, mix a scotch and disrobe. It’s all very simple. The Hot Father is every boy’s first fantasy. Oh, and for God’s sake let’s get some hung men. I’m haunted by the images of all the slim penises on this site. This site looks more like its shot in some lower-middle class house; in the suburbs of Iowa (no disrespect if that’s your thing). But I have a very intricate and developed love for Daddies. And I’m not letting a crappy porn site ruin that. Thankyouverymuch.